Let's Talk About Me

Well, this week has been a doozy! My ENT moved my sinus surgery up 2 weeks, so I had it last Thursday. And it sucked. I am not going to lie. I kind of thought people were exaggerating when they said I was going to want to die. They weren't. I take that back. I wanted to die ... until I realized the WONDERFUL Dr. Escudero had actually READ my medication history and did not screw around with the drugs. Helloooooo highest dose of Percocet I have ever had! I was a very happy camper. And so, this may be a very interested blog post!

First, I do not recommend this surgery unless you have to have it. It hurts to do things you would not believe. And you have a bloody nose for 48 hours and have to wear this funky drip pad thing that you have to change every hour because you are soaking the gauze with your blood. And your nose swells. And you think. "Oh, I will put a cold compress on it. That will make it feel better!" WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!! Your nose is so tender you can't kiss your husband, let alone put an ice pack on it!!!!! However, you CAN put a compress on your cheeks and eyes to help speed the healing of the black eyes. OK, not BLACK, but definitely yellow. And puffy. So I basically crawled into bed and put myself in a Percocet induced coma for 2 days. It was wonderful.

But the thing is, this surgery is a sneaky bastard. Oh, you think "Nose surgery is not even invasive? I am going to be up and around in no time!!!!" WRONG AGAIN. You are as weak as the newborn baby (Hi Baby Samantha! Auntie Charity loves you!!!!!!) my best friend had this morning. You have to have someone around because you can't make it up and down the stairs in your house without getting tired. And I sure as hell hope you went grocery shopping before 'cause that SUCKS if you do it 4 days after because your husband is claiming to be sick (he has allergies) and can't go for you, even though there are things you need. So you have to go because he is being a baby (like all men when they are sick) and he doesn't even turn his CELL PHONE on while you are gone. No, I am not bitter about this at all. He is still paying for this transgression and probably will be until I am back at work. In 2 weeks.

My point? I am pissed. I have cabin fever, but don't have the energy to go anywhere. I am sick of FarmVille and YoVille and every other FacebookVille there is. I want HUMAN INTERACTION that I am not related to. I baked scones today, just for something to do (they are so easy, I can make them in 10 minutes and then I can go rest. For an hour. Because that is how f-ing tired making them made me.). They were delicious by the way. The guys at Big-O will be happy tomorrow. Me? I am thinking more drugs tomorrow. I just want to wake up and feel normal. On the bright side, even with the outrageously swollen nose, I can breathe better than I could before the surgery. Which gives me hope for when I am fully recovered.

Now though? I am bored. And grumpy. And lonely. And I hurt. And I am sick of daytime TV, but lack the energy to put a movie in. And I hate that I live in the boonies and can't get wireless Internet. Because that means I have to actually get up and out of bed to check my email. And that makes me grumpy. I wanted to work on my book, but I need the Internet for research. Which means I can't work on my book from bed. And I feel just crappy enough to really, really want to get OUT of bed, but not have the energy to do so. The doc says I should be able to start doing "half of your normal day" about a week after the surgery. I can also blow my nose then which, along with bending over and picking up anything over 10 pounds, is forbidden. So I figure about Thursday my life should start to feel better. And I sure as hell hope it does because I am about 2 steps from going absolutely, certifiably, INSANE.

I think I need another happy pill ... and any ideas you have for staying halfway sane!!!!!